Monday: The European Union, ECB, IMF, and Greek government announce a definitive, binding deal to supply liquidity and institutionalize austerity in Greece. The Dow rises 500 points!
Tuesday: The European Union, ECB, and IMF announce a definitive, binding agreement to stimulate growth, supply liquidity, and institutionalize austerity in the PIIGS. The Dow rises another 500 points.
Wednesday: Congress and the President realize the cost of NOT passing the Simpson-Bowles Compromise last year is ALREADY $130 billion and rising. They announce unanimous support for immediate implementation of that bipartisan deal. The Dow rises another 1,000 points.
Thursday: Our AAA credit rating is restored. The Dow rises another 500 points and passes 15,000 for a new record high.
Friday: China announces they will “forgive” the $900+ billion we owe them. The United Nations annouces there will be “peace on Earth and goodwill toward men.” The Dow rises yet another 1,000 points into record territory, passing 16,000.
Saturday: The whole world spends a well-deserved day celebrating! There is much hugging, back-slapping, and high-5ing around the globe!
Sunday: The world spends a day praying that we don’t wake up and realize that this is just another old man’s fantasy . . .